Monday, July 9, 2012


I know I haven't posted in a long time. With this post tho I am going to be completely honest and open. Maybe more open than I have ever been on the blog. Here goes....

I am afraid. I am so afraid of failing at something that most times I don't even try to do them. I can remember wanting to do things, especially in high school and backing out because I was just convinced that I wouldn't be able to do them. Sports, dancing, clubs,even playing certain games with friends... you name it. If I were afraid I would look foolish, I would back out.

What is just as bad is if I try something and it doesn't come easy, I think I have already failed at it so I back out of it. Maybe that's why I haven't written more on the blog. I can't easily come up with things to write about so I just don't write instead of researching things that you may be interested in reading about. Then I look at how many people have seen this blog and I get discouraged that only a few of you read it when I should be happy that I am accomplishing something I set out to do. I think to myself if success doesn't come easily then I'm a failure at said thing.

I mentioned this to Christian the other day and I agree with him when he answered that it's all a lie that Satan is whispering to me; keeping me from doing the things that God would like me to do. Christian blogs everyday about what he reads in his daily Bible reading-EVERYDAY. Because around Christmas he decided this was something he was going to do and he has done it. I am confident that he would keep doing it even if no one read it because he committed to it- THAT my friends is success. He set a goal and will not give up until he accomplishes that goal.

So, how do I get to that point? Figure out something to do, to work at. Something that may be hard for me, out of my comfort zone. I have a few ideas... some things that I tried in the past and then dropped, when the going got tough. I have one thing going currently that is harder than it feels like it should be and wondering how long I should stick with it.

How long should I stick with it is a fair question. I'm sure there are times when quitting is an option. When?
Well, ask yourself a few questions.
1.Is this endeavor interfering with my relationship with God? If yes, I think it's time to quit. I don't think God wants us doing anything (even Holy works) if it gets in the way of your time with Him.
2.Is this interfering with my relationship with my family? Same answer. When you married you made a covenant between God, your spouse and yourself. When you have kids you are committed to raise them in a Godly house and spending time with them teaching them.
3.Is this endeavor affecting your finances in a negative way? If this is simply a hobby and you have budgeted for the expense then keep going, but if you can't feed your family or otherwise pay your bills then it's time to give up. All things under the sun belong to God, even the money we work for and God does not want us to misuse His things.
4.Have you set a reasonable timeline for this endeavor and not seen the results you are expecting at the end of this time? This one is tricky and I think it's up to you. Some people just don't have the talent to do some things and if you are seeing NO improvement at all, maybe that's you. Maybe you didn't set a long enough time frame to accomplish the goal you wanted- for me, perfecting a recipe should only take a few tries but learning to play an instrument (other than my MP3 player) will take years. And I don't even attempt singing for an audience.

So what could I do if I weren't afraid of failing, of stepping out of my comfort zone? What could you do? What have you done?


  1. I'm thinking. :) I love that you make me think.

  2. I have two big things in my life that I am doing, but have a constant fear of failing at in the back of my head - my blog and homeschooling. I understand what you mean about being discouraged when only a few people read your blog. I posted one the other day and 3 people looked at it - and one was my mom so she doesn't count! :) And I'm so afraid of people thinking I'm a quitter or I never follow through with things if I don't finish this weekly bible study I started recently on there. *sigh* Oh well. Like your husband said, it's all lies from the enemy. My dad used to say "Try something so impossible that if God isn't in it it is bound to fail." I'm trying to be brave like that. :) Thank you for the blog - I know I'm not alone and we can pray for each other!

  3. I think the first question--before all the rest--should be: Did I begin this endeavor at the unquestionable prompting of the Holy Spirit? If so, then the rest of the questions are taken off the table, in my humble opinion. I'm not saying that this happens often during one lifetime, but maybe once or twice. Of course, if there is a wedge between you and your spouse, then that is a whole different set of issues. So many variables in life.

    You have the gift of being able to use your words to make people think. I like that!